I just want to start out by saying, Thank you Abba for this season of my life. Do I like it, not necessarily. Do I enjoy some days, yes. Do I cry in others, yes. Buttt, I’m learning that this is Your will.
There is so much I would love to write for all to read, but I must always use wisdom in my transparency.
This year did not start out the way I had imagined or hoped for. I started off with this year fighting to find the missing piece of me that I had given freely in the last season on my last voyage.
I learned so much about who God was to me and who he was in general. He showed me a few things about myself that had been hidden and not fully examined that needed to be uprooted. At this point I had become desperate for God to do an internal deep cleansing and detox.
So when this year started…I recalled a word that was given to me.. About Fine Tuning and Grooming.
Though, It was not my Father’s wish for me to cry most of my days starting out, or to stay in bed unmoved and wallow in the results of my mistakes (which will come in a later blog piece),It allowed me to grow closer to him.
And God, being as good as he is, will always turn your sorrow into joy.. Will always use what the Devil meant for evil and what he meant to destroy you with.. To Make you even more into the masterpiece you were created to be.
As I sit here typing,I can’t even tell you how I climbed out of the depression that tried to wrap it’s grimy hands around my neck and choke me. I can’t tell you that I had the will power to be where I am today and have most of the prayers I prayed the beginning of this year actually answered. I can’t tell you that I had anything to do with the Love God has made sure to show me this very year alone and as well as this season.
All I can say is.. It’s by His Grace. He has so much in store for me and in order to get to them, pain, stretching, and Tuning..Fine..Tuning must be endured.
I can’t say that I haven’t progressed or grown since January or even since I got off The beautiful Constellation Boat. I can’t help but praise and thank him for it all… If it were not for my brokenness and my mess ups ,I wouldn’t have grown to another level of relationship with him.
This year alone, he has graced me to be able to be financially stable.. Something I’ve dreamed of for years.. And even with that, he has more to come within my businesses..
He has graced me to afford my own apartment that I’m not paying with Student College Refund..
Gloryyyy be to God. C’mon somebody.. You all know what I’m talking about.
And last but certainly not least..My Abba Father has graced me with a “Paid in Cash”car that I most definitely had favor and was graced for. The story of how far I drove to get it and the discipline to lean on His understanding and not my own just to be blessed in that way, alone would blow your mind…
Honestly every time I look at Glory(my golden Honda Accord) I marvel in Awe at my King, who blessed his daughter,lil ole me with her first car at 27 years of age.
I’m still blown.
I’m really learning that nothing I have is because of Me. But it is all in spite of Me. Because God just loves me unconditionally and chooses to display His infinite Glory!
So as I Grow through this season of my life.. There may be times I’m quiet or seem to not be around, and then they’ll be times I have much to say and you’ll see me… But Don’t sleep on me.. I myself may have been sleeping.. But like sleeping Beauty, only a touch.. The right touch awakened This Beauty.
I’m being Fine Tuned and when all is done and the season of that is over, we will hear the most confident beautiful sound we’ve both ever heard. And all in favor of God said, Amen.🎶🎤🎼🎹